Somebody please help me!

Yesterday, the sun shone through wispy clouds as it always does on those days you want to forget. A cold day, yet the sun pretends to warm you as your breath clouds your senses. I was out and about minding my own business when I saw the man get shot. Hit first in the arm, he spun around in front of me like a merry go round, his eyes staring into mine. I wanted to ignore him, Hell I didn't need this, an ex-wife and two kids to support are enough for one man to deal with. After he finished with his puppet motion, he looked straight at me, and mouthed something. I knew this was my cue to be the brave good Samaritan and reach out to him, but I was barely holding onto my bladder. When the first shot echoed through the alleyway I cut through every day to go to my job, I dove behind the nearest dumpster. Of course, in San Francisco, the nearest dumpster is never far away. And I wasn't about to leave it to go help a bleeding man, not in the era of AIDs, thank you very much.

As I quivered...yes, I said it, I freaking quivered, no other word for it, even though that seems less than masculine, I don't care. I shook and shimmied and almost wet myself...the man crawled toward my dumpster.... No, I yelled in my mind, don't crawl toward me, go somewhere else. I thought about shouting to him to get up, it's only your arm that was shot, but again, I was quivering, and knew my voice would crack, further emasculating me.

He looked over at me again, and then he threw his briefcase at me, and whispered for me to hide it. So I did.

Don't tell anyone were his last words before he pulled out a gun and shot across the way, at what I didn't know. He was shot in his right arm, so he was shooting left handed, and it looked awkward. Another man approached him, dressed all in black. I couldn't see his face, and the man who was shot actually laughed at him. Go ahead and shoot me, Tonio, he said. It won't change a thing.

Then the second guy shot the first guy. I had to hold down the vomit.

I hid there for at least an hour. God help me, I didn't know what else to do.

Now I'm home, and I have this briefcase. I can't get into it. I don't know if I want to get into it. But its sitting here. I think I should throw it off the Golden Gate, but what if there's money inside? I need that money to see my kids.

What should I do?